6 maxims of the honorable Zoommate

Photo by Chris Montgomery on Unsplash

zoom·mate | zo͞om-māt | (noun): A former officemate currently trapped inside a two inch frame on your laptop screen.

If you’re like me, you’ve honed your Zoom “listening” gestures. You practice the odd nod, the grunt of approval, the raised, open-handed wave goodbye. You also recognize that your zoommates constantly compete for your attention against the 17 other windows you’ve got open.

It’s hard to establish a strong virtual culture across nine time zones, a dozen product teams and a single screen. When the circumstances of collaboration are confined to this setting, it can be painfully hard to focus, contribute and (frankly) care.

These small habits are designed to make you a better zoommate with a happier team and a wildly productive zoom-life balance.

Anything worth reading requires 48 hours to review

Here’s the problem…

Collaboration is difficult enough when we can’t come together. When you deprive your zoommates the opportunity to bring their full analysis to the conversation, it signals a lack of interest in their contribution or it showcases poor time management because you didn’t produce something worth their feedback with enough time for them to provide it.

Here’s what we can do about it…

If you need someone to ‘process’ or ‘evaluate’ your work, respect the fact that these things take time and send it to them beforehand. This helps you arrive to the conversation fully prepared — No hiding behind the time constraint of the call, confusion over semantics, or your unease with being (respectfully!) challenged.

Here’s how to build the habit…

The next time you want to engage your zoommates in an honest, collaborative effort on a piece of work, a seed of an idea, or a set of designs, schedule your followup for no sooner than 48 hours after you send, tag, or attach it. This way you aren’t just paying lip service to a feedback culture, you are participating in it.

Creating a meeting without an agenda means you should cancel it

Here’s the problem…

By calling people together without purpose, you perpetuate the cycle of doing stuff instead of getting stuff done.

Here’s what we can do about it…

If the content of the conversation is not even worth a thought beforehand, it may be an excuse to stay busy at the expense of being productive. Become more critical of what constitutes time well spent. The only good reason to have a meeting is to accomplish something together that you cannot do better alone.

Here’s how to build the habit…

Any time you schedule a meeting, that meeting should have an agenda.

Sharing is not the same as involving

Here’s the problem…

Default Zoom mode is like 1950s table manners for kids: do not speak unless spoken to. We literally put ourselves on Mute to prevent accidental contribution. We have approximately zero cues to work off and we miss out on valuable input when we don’t make room for quiet speakers, introverts, and non-confrontational personalities. Ensure you are not mistaking silence for consensus. This is still pretty awkward!

Here’s what we can do about it…

True collaboration is everyone bringing their own tools to a build that requires every one of them. Endorse your belief in virtual collaboration by involving your team in decisions that affect them.

Here’s how to build the habit…

The next time you’re writing team goals or customer metrics, set up time to discuss them. Create space for everyone by asking questions (a clear cue that it’s another person’s turn to talk) and take care not to platform a point just because you’ve got a captive audience.

Curiosity kills no one

Here’s the problem…

When you don’t explicitly invite feedback, you can come off uninformed or ill prepared to receive the thoughts, feelings, and reactions of your zoommates. When you leave them no room to respond, they will quickly position their thumb and pointer for Ctrl+W.

Here’s what we can do about it…

Open-ended questions lead to ah-ha moments, close-ended questions lead to dead ends. Create more insights for your zoommates by involving them in the conversation.

Here’s how to build the habit…

Keep your questions open-ended. “Does anyone have any thoughts?” becomes “What haven’t we covered?” or “What else should we think about?” or “What’s missing here?” This invites conversation and discourages the boring, binary “yes or no” you force on your zoomates with close-ended questions.

Put your hands up

Here’s the problem…

It is disturbingly easy to get distracted by any of the 35 tabs you’ve got lined up in your browser.

Here’s what we can do about it…

Find a way to get your upper body into the Zoom frame. Show your hands somehow. Let your zoommates know you’re listening. There is no way you’re scrolling on LinkedIn during standup if your body language makes it physically impossible.

Here’s how to build the habit…

The perfect Zoom pose may very well be holding your arms closer to your side with your hands raised to just below your chin (Sorry Amy Cuddy, this goes against everything you taught us).

Leave on time

Here’s the problem…

Ending late creates a fast moving domino effect. Your zoommates may have other engagements but feel rude cutting each other off. You’re taking time from those waiting for you in the next meeting. These minutes add up and compound that new thing called Zoom fatigue.

Here’s what we can do about it…

Punctuality is table stakes, but just as important is the habit of ending a meeting on time. Set the precedent for your zoommates that you respect that their time is valuable.

Here’s how to build the habit…

Countdown the final 5 or 10 minutes of your call so you and your zoommates can budget the rest of your time together accordingly. If you’ve reached time and everyone’s on a roll, great! Just make sure to check in with others to see if they can also stick around, and support anyone who needs to leave (they don’t need to tell you why- they are technically free!).

There you have it. Six maxims for the ubiquitous zoom meetings in meeting rooms that don’t actually exist. I’m building these into my own virtual culture in pursuit of clarity, consensus, and collaboration in this new working paradigm.