I romanticized the Startup Life
The freedom of it all.
In this article, I reflect on what it was like to visit an incubator for the first time. For those of you who are unfamiliar with the term “incubator,” an incubator is a company that assists with the development of new startups by providing advisory services and administrative support. It’s also used as a term to describe the workspace that hosts said new startups.
The incubator turned out narrower than expected. It boasted depth, but not so much width. Unlike the maze-like offices of New York’s large white-shoe law firms, many of which I had visited prior as part of some formal event, the space was open. Individual offices and cubicles were nowhere to be seen.
The large floor-to-ceiling windows opened up to the street, but no one was staring outwards, only inwards. Into their inboxes, probably, nervously accepting calendar invites, responding to event invitations, and rearranging colorful blocks on their calendars, making sure no white space was left to be seen.
The nervous energy that permeated the room made me feel at home. This was the kind of frenetic work culture that I worshipped so much. A builder’s culture, obsessed with creating that elusive thing called value. Startup culture wasn’t just about money and fame, but ideals. Ideals upheld through grueling, sweaty work, work that at times would not get validated for months, sometimes even years to come.
It was a wide-open space that was packed, filled with head-phoned people typing nervously or speaking in long sentences. They all spoke in the same earnest manner — their speech exhaustive, heavy, purposeful.
That kind of speech bothered me.
Speech is laden with business-speak, which brought me back to my days in big corporate outfits where all work was microscopic and thus seemingly insignificant.
I had looked to startups as an escape from corporate life. As a breath of fresh air. What I wanted so desperately was to have idealism imbued in my work, and to be far away from the serious tones of business.
As a result, reality at first disappointed.
I had romanticized startup life.
Those were the worried thoughts that floated through my mind as I waited patiently for my host to pick me up. I had scheduled a coffee chat with a startup CEO to get a glimpse into the life of an entrepreneur.
I didn’t know what to expect, but I did carry one expectation.
I wanted to wholeheartedly like what I would get to see.
And my worries?
Caused by the creeping realization that I wouldn’t.
“Welcome,” he said as he approached me. We shook hands. “Like what you see?”
I looked around the room. I had expected a paradise of inspiration and rah-rah, and what surrounded me instead were nervous, casually dressed people, frantically staring into their screens.
“I think I’ll get used to it,” I responded.
I think I’ll get used to the imperfection, the grind, the messiness,
The freedom of it all.
Note: I wrote this a few months ago. I have quite a different perspective on startup building now, but this was at one point how I felt about startups, probably because I had a very incomplete understanding of what it would be like to work on and at one.
